By Mike Knapp
Remember the scene in the movie Pretty Woman, when Julia Roberts walks into that swanky Beverly Hills boutique in her…ahem…lady of the evening-wear, and gets run out of the store by the snooty salesperson, then returns the next day in full hottie form carrying a bunch of expensive stuff from another shop?
Remember what she tells the salesperson?
“Big mistake. Big. Huge.”
Since a large piece of my life revolves around pop culture and movie quotes, this was one of the first things I thought of when I heard that, once again, Michael Andretti and his group were denied entry into Formula 1.
Of course, F1 was kind enough to tell Andretti that he could try again for the 2028 season, but still, the damage is done. And, for the way F1 has led Andretti along, does anyone believe they could ever meet the necessary and constantly goalpost-moving criteria?
Doubt it.
Because if you look at the reasons given, most were pretty stupid, especially two in particular.
One reason was that they didn’t think that Andretti could create a competitive team. Like really, does that even matter? There are a lot of crappy F1 teams on the grid, which is top-heavy and goes downhill from there.
When many of the teams on the grid are just happy to finish in points paying position, competition isn’t your top priority. If we’re talking about competitiveness, when did Williams last win a race? Aston Martin? Haas?
There are a lot of crappy teams on the grid, so even if Andretti came in and fell flat onto its face, what’s one more?
The other is even more laughable: that inclusion into F1 would bring more to the Andretti brand than vice versa.
Seriously? This smacks of elitist bullshit, the same as the thought that the grid is composed of the 20 best drivers in the world. That isn’t true either, despite what anyone tries to say.
I mean, if these guys are all so good, how come none of them showed up for the Rolex 24 over the weekend? Drivers from pretty much every other top-level racing series on the planet did, especially the current and former IndyCar drivers, who as always more than held their own in cars they only race a handful of times a year.
And as far as the Andretti brand goes, it has been strong for more than a half-century, and it will remain that way for the foreseeable future. The Andretti name and brand has long stood for excellence, and while the IndyCar team has had a couple of lean years recently, Andretti-backed teams find success in whatever form of racing in which they field cars.
Not to mention, what would the Andretti brand mean to F1 in North America? Right now F1 races five times in our fine continent, and after recently trademarking four different versions of a grand prix name for Chicago, they are trying to add more.
If that happens, close to 20 percent of the schedule will be held here. Wouldn’t an iconic brand be beneficial in this part of the world?
Let’s be honest, this comes down to one thing: money. There are 10 teams on the grid, and an 11th one means less money in their pockets. Could an 11th team change the amount of money that comes out of the Liberty Media ATM?
Of course. The more you slice up a pie, the smaller the pieces, unless, of course, Andretti would make the pie bigger, which I believe it would. I mean, an Andretti team in Formula One would make me pay attention, and I’m sure it would a lot of others as well.
I’d watch races, I’d buy merch, and if the driver lineup included an American driver like Colton Herta, I’d splurge and take in a race weekend, especially if one was going down about 30 miles from where I live.
But even if it didn’t, would smaller pieces of pie have a significant effect to any of the teams involved?
I doubt it. The money in F1 is absolutely silly. Last year each team’s budget cap was $135 million, which doesn’t include driver salaries. According to some sources, seven of the 20 drivers on the grid are paid more than $10 million, and even team principals like Toto Wolff and Christian Horner pull home well into eight figures annually.
You take money, ego, and an elitist attitude, and you have a closed-off society that only wants “certain people” to be let in.
Andretti has been at this long enough, and I think it’s time for him to tell F1 to kiss his ass.
And if I were him, you know what I’d do?
Build a dynasty.
I know how much Michael loves racing, and how much he enjoys competing in different series. And as a positive, that keeps a lot of people employed.
But if it were me, I’d pare it down. A two-car IndyCar team, and a sports car program. Throw all of your money and resources into just that, start winning and keep on winning. And if the day ever comes that F1 comes calling, just say:
“You know, I think F1 would benefit more than Andretti would with this partnership, so no thanks.”
I hope that scenario happens. God, do I ever hope that happens.
In the meantime, I won’t pay attention to F1, as usual. Well, except maybe for Monza, because I was there once and it was like a religious experience.
I blogged about it back in 2013 if you want to read it.
Hey, that’s fine with me, it gives me more time to follow IndyCar and IMSA, which as of right now is some of the most competitive racing on the planet.
Because, it’s supposed to be about the racing, right?
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